I LOVE the smell of green
by John 'Doc' Holliday
Summary: This is the military tale and autobiography of everyone's favorite hard ass sergeant major. Avery Johnson. It picks up at his first duty station and will end where everyone knows his tale comes to a close. Or will it? This is only rated M in case the violence gets too graphic. It shouldn't get worse than T. oh and M for minor adult themes. THIS is Sergeant Johnson we're talkin bout
1. He knows what the ladies like

He Knows What the Ladies Like

The first half of the first chapter is going to be diary style, and set right before that f* $!n Guilty Spark lased him. The second half starts with his intro to the UNSC in the colonial rebellions. So please bear with me. Anyway enjoy, tell your friends, and DO drop a review makes me feel appreciated, that I'm actually doing something right or wrong. For now ~ Holliday.

_If you told the younger me, Private First Class Avery Junior Wet Behind The Ears Rookie Johnson that I would turn into bad ass Sergeant Major Avery Junior_ Blow The Hell Out Of Your Alien Ass _Johnson. I would have called you a damn liar and spat in your face. But here I am about to lead a charge into one scary ass alien artifact. I guess y'all are wondering how I got from there to here. Well it's a long story that I guess you deserve to hear, so here goes. – Johnson._

"Avery are you coming or not?" My good friend Corporal Andrew Wheeler asked.

"Yeah boy I got us a Warthog from stores. One of them new crew transport ones." Sergeant Matthew Linx, our friend by night, our boss by day.

"I'm coming, I just got to finish cleaning this new MA5B. These put the sexy in assault rifles." I whined, Yeah I really did whine as a little kid.

"Awwww…. You can do that later Marine, I, as your sergeant, clear you of maintenance routines. So pick up your ass and let's go Johnson." Linx barked.

"Besides AJ, you can't cuddle with an AR." Wheeler gave me one of those knowing winks. Man that guy is really rough around the edges.

[Thirty minutes later, at the Rusty Tankard, a real dirty bar with real bad beer.]

Some burly redneck belched, and yelled "Hey Necko (the lady who owned this 'fine establishment') I ordered horse piss, not cow piss!" There have been a lot of rude comment about the taste of the beer.

I glare morosely at my stein still nearly full, it does taste like piss, smells like it too. The beer's expensive, tastes like shit, the music is hick and way too loud, the place smells and looks like a barn. Nothing good about this leave… Whoa hey now who are those fine things? Three Beeeuatiful young ladies just walked in all three wearing matching tank tops and Daisy Dukes, I wonder how that nickname got started anyhow. Nothing seemed to missing from these girls except, except me…

Andy spoke up, "I see you looking AJ, you ain't going to be able to get them chicks man, so just give it up."

Linx winked, "Andy, just give the boy a chance to crash in burn. How you gonna do this son?"

I just look up and grin from ear to ear, "I know what the ladies like."

**To be continued next chapter.**


	2. Insurrection

Insurrection

Listen I've gotten quite a few hits and 1 review. I'm pretty tempted to stop. So drop a review even if it is just to say I suck. "My name is Avery Johnson, and I want YOU to review this book you flea ridden sand maggot!"

"Hey Avery open up, if we don't get back soon we're going to be charged as AWOL!" Andrew was shouting at my door. Man, oh man I did not want to get up this girl was fine, and I was enjoying my Sweet William that that strange old Sergeant, Mendez, F. his tag said, gave me. He was marching these kids around the base. KIDS man! They were treating them like me at basic, but a whole hell of a lot tougher. I somehow drag myself out of my bed and get dressed. Not the best I've looked but presentable. Sarah, that was her name, is still asleep with a little grin I kiss her gently and leave my number by her head. Now I am ready to go. Five minutes later the three of us are at the Hog and my new cigar is almost gone. Before me and the Sarge could climb in the entire bar blew up.

"Innies! Damn them they killed Sarah!" I'm screaming, I'm screaming? This voice full of rage and hatred is mine? Two men come out of a nearby building whooping and cheering. I'm gonna give them something to cheer about as I pull out my M6A standard issue sidearm. I line up the sights and breathe. Squeeeeze.

BLAM! I shift targets and squeeze the trigger again. The panic on Innie number two is sweet. BLAM! I say nothing as I climb inside and holster my handgun. "Are we going home or not boys?'

"Y-yeah Avery we're going" Andy shakily answers.

Linx speaks up, "You did good dropping them like that…" silence reigns. "Son, it's not your fault what happened to those girls ok? Shit happens remember this next time you look an Insurrectionist in the face remember what they did here. Not just to Sarah, Jamie, and Liz but to the building and the soldiers and the bar tender. This is your charge to remember them, but not to carry them."

I nodded, not understanding but knowing I would soon enough. Soon enough.

**{Three days later at firing range Alpha}**

"Congrats! Marines you're being transferred to Alpha squad of the 5th, the ODST's." Sergeant Linx hands me and Corporal Wheeler our transfer orders.

"Thank you sir!" We reply in unison.

My phone buzzes so I sneak off during all the back slapping I answer it, "Corporal Johnson speaking who is this?"

"You've gotten brusque AJ." The coy voice replies.

Overlapping visions fill my head, Daisy Dukes, beers, a hotel room, a cigar, a phone number, a bomb, and two dead bombers. "Sarah?" I croak. The party goes silent.


End file.
